The Lumberjack Song from "Monty Python's Flying Circus"
Continued from Petshop, Barber, or a variety of other Python sketches....

I never wanted to do this job in the first place!
I... I wanted to be...

A LUMBERJACK!

(piano vamp)

Leaping from tree to tree! As they float down the mighty rivers of
British Columbia! With my best girl by my side!
The Larch!
The Pine!
The Giant Redwood tree!
The Sequoia!
The Little Whopping Rule Tree!
We'd sing! Sing! Sing!


Oh, I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

CHORUS: He's a lumberjack, and he's okay,
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

I cut down trees, I eat my lunch,
I go to the lava-try.
On Wednesdays I go shoppin'
And have buttered scones for tea.

Mounties: He cuts down trees, he eats his lunch,
He goes to the lava-try.
On Wednesdays 'e goes shoppin'
And has buttered scones for tea.

CHORUS

I cut down trees, I skip and jump,
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing,
And hang around in bars.

Mounties: He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps,
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around.... In bars???????

CHORUS

I chop down trees, I wear high heels,
Suspendies and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie
Just like my dear papa.

Mounties: He cuts down trees, he wears high heels
Suspendies?? and a .... a Bra????
(spoken, raggedly) What's this? Wants to be a *girlie*? Oh, My!
And I thought you were so rugged! Poofter!

CHORUS

All: He's a lumberjack, and he's okaaaaaaayyy..... (BONG)

Sound Cue: The Liberty Bell March, by John Phillip Sousa.
-or-
===============================================================================

Dear Sir,
I wish to complain on the stronglyest possible terms about the previous
entry in this file about the lumberjack who wears womens' clothes. Some of
my best friends are lumberjacks, and only a FEW of them are transvestites.

Yours faithfully,
Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong, Mrs.

P.S. I have never kissed the editor of the radio times.

And I thought you were so rugged, BuZZ :-P

---

And I thought you were so rugged, BuZZ :-P

hehehe

Physical - Olivia Newton John

I'm saying all the things that I know you'll like
Making good conversation
I gotta handle you just right
You know what I mean
I took you to an intimate restaurant
Then to a suggestive movie
There's nothing left to talk about
Unless it's horizontally

Let's get physical, physical
I wanna get physical
Let's get into physical
Let me hear your body talk, your body talk
Let me hear your body talk

I've been patient, I've been good
Tried to keep my hands on the table
It's gettin' hard this holdin' back
If you know what I mean

I'm sure you'll understand my point of view
We know each other mentally
You gotta know that you're bringin' out
The animal in me

Let's get physical, physical
I wanna get physical
Let's get into physical
Let me hear your body talk, your body talk
Let me hear your body talk

Let's get physical, physical
I wanna get physical
Let's get into physical
Let me hear your body talk, your body talk
Let me hear your body talk

Let's get physical, physical
I wanna get physical
Let's get into physical
Let me hear your body talk, your body talk
Let me hear your body talk

Let's get animal, animal
I wanna get animal
Let's get into animal
Let me hear your body talk
Let me hear your body talk

---

Life on earth is the global equivalent of not storing things in the fridge.

Liar - Henry Rollins


you think you're gonna to live your life alone
in darkness
and seclusion
yeah I know
you've been out there
tried to mix with those animals
and it just left you full of humiliated confusion
so you stagger back home
and wait for nothing
but the solitary refinement of your room spits you back out onto the street
and now you're desperate
and in need of human contact
and then
you meet me
and your whole world changes
because everything I say is everything you've ever wanted to hear
so you drop all your defenses and you drop all your fears
and you trust me completely
I'm perfect
in every way
cause I make you feel so strong and so powerful inside
you feel so lucky
but your ego obscures reality
and you never bother to wonder why
things are going so well
you wanna know why?
cause I'm a liar
yeah I'm a liar
I'll tear your mind out
I'll burn your soul
I'll turn you into me
I'll turn you into me
cause I'm a liar, a liar
a liar, a liar

I'll hide behind a smile
and understanding eyes
and I'll tell you things that you already know
so you can say
I really identify with you, so much
and all the time that you're needing me
is just the time that I'm bleeding you
don't you get it yet?
I'll come to you like an affliction
and I'll leave you like an addiction
you'll never forget me
you wanna know why?
cause I'm a liar
yeah I'm a liar
I'll rip your mind out
I'll burn your soul
I'll turn you into me
I'll turn you into me
cause I'm a liar, a liar
liar, liar, liar, liar

I don't know why I feel the need to lie
and cause you so much pain
maybe it's something inside
maybe it's something I can't explain
cause all I do
is mess you up and lie to you
I'm a liar
oh, I am a liar

if you'll give me one more chance
I swear that I will never lie to you again
because now I see the destructive power of a lie
they're stronger than truth
I can't believe I ever hurt you
I swear
I will never to you lie again, please
just give me one more chance
I will never lie to you again
I swear
that I will never tell a lie
I will never tell a lie
no, no
ha ha ha ha ha hah haa haa haa haaa
sucker
sucker!
oh, sucker
I am a liar
yeah, I am a liar
yeah I like it
I feel good
ohh I am a liar
yeah
I lie
I lie
I lie
oh, I lie
oh I lie
I lie
yeah
ohhh I'm a liar
I lie
yeah
I like it
I feel good
I'll lie again
and again
I'll lie again and again
and I'll keep lying
I promise

---

Plateu- Meat Puppets

Many a hand has scaled the grand old face of the plateu
some belong to strangers and some to folks you know
Holy ghost some talkshow host some planted in the sand
Beautify the foothills shaped by many hands

There's nothin' on the top but a bucket and a mop
and an illustrated book about birds
see a lot up there, but don't be scared
who needs action when you've got words

When you've finished with the mop then you can stop
And look at what you've done
The plateau's clean, no dirt to be seen
And the work it was fun

Nothing on the top but a bucket and a mop
And an illustrated book about birds
You see a lot up there but don't be scared
Who needs action when you got words

Many hands began to scan around for the next plateau
Some say it was Greenland and some say Mexico
others decided it was nowhere except for where they stood
But those were all just guesses, wouldn't help you if they could

---

Still looking for something profound or inspirational to place here.

Pearl Necklace - ZZ Top

Shes really upset with me again,
I didnt give her what she likes.
I dont know what to tell her,
Dont know what to say.
Everything got funky last night.

She was really bombed,
And I was really blown away,
Until I asked her what she wanted,
And this is what she had to say:
A pearl necklace.
She wanna pearl necklace.
She wanna pearl necklace.

She gets a charge out of bein so weird,
Digs gettin downright strange.
But I can keep a handle on anything,
Just this side of deranged.

She was gettin bombed,
And I was gettin blown away,
And she held it in her hand
And this is what she had to say:
A pearl necklace.
She wanna pearl necklace.
She wanna pearl necklace.

Shes so cold, as pure as the driven slush.
And thats not jewelry shes talkinabout, [see notes]
It really dont cost that much.

She was gettin bombed,
And I was gettin blown away,
And she took it in her hand,
And this is what she had to say:
A pearl necklace.
She wanna pearl necklace.
She wanna pearl necklace.

---

Life on earth is the global equivalent of not storing things in the fridge.

Mexican Radio by Celtic Frost ♪

I feel a hot wind on my shoulder
And the touch of a world that's older
Turn the switch and check the number
Leave it on, in bed I slumber

Hear the rhythm of the music
Buy the product, never use it
Hear the talking of the DJ
Can't understand, what's he say?

I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio

Dial it in, tune the station
They talk about U.S. inflation
I understand just a little
No comprende - it's a riddle

I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio

Wish I was in Tijuana -
Eating barbecued iguana
I'd take requests on the telephone
I'm on a wavelength far from home

I feel the hot wind on my shoulder
I dial in, south of the border
Hear the talking of the DJ -
Can't understand, what's he say?

I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio

Radio
Radio
Radio
What does he say?

I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio
I'm on the Mexican radio ...

---

Hero

Machinae Supremacy Originals

They try to beat me
but they will not ever defeat me
This time we're on my battlegrounds
I'm gonna win, trust in me
I have come to save this world
and in the end I'll get the grrrl!

I've missed it, so twisted
and unsurpassed in my head
This sense of power has awakened in me
I feel I could take on the world
a day like this
my rage is brewing like a storm

And now the storm has grown
out of control
Right here, the voice of anger
taking tone
Cause now the fire
in our hearts explode
Baby, let's blow this joint
and build our own

Sometimes you just need to
level everything with the ground to
make room for all the things
you wanted somehow
And I have known it all along
the day is coming
when you will reap your evil ways

(For NC and the Cafe .. You can download your version in .ogg or .mp3 from the Discography site. :) For Free.)

I don't really enjoy football, but here is my contribution to the karaoke thread
on the first day of the World Cup in Germany.

It is a song originally from a Rogers and Hammerstein musical called Carousel.
Football fans will know this as the 'Anfield Anthem'.........

You'll Never Walk Alone

When you walk through a storm
Keep your chin up high
And don't be afraid of the dark.
At he end of the storm
Is a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of a lark.

Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Tho' your dreams be tossed and blown.
Walk on,
Walk on
With hope in your heart
And you'll never walk alone,
You'll never walk alone.

---

Hero

Machinae Supremacy Originals

They try to beat me
but they will not ever defeat me
This time we're on my battlegrounds
I'm gonna win, trust in me
I have come to save this world
and in the end I'll get the grrrl!

Haven't listened to them much before so I was surprised how good they sounded. I especially like the double bass drum work in it.

---

Haven't listened to them much before so I was surprised how good they sounded. I especially like the double bass drum work in it.

Another fan. Yay. :)
I like their use of the SID machine combined with really good guitar work!
And of course great lyrics.

And no, I am not asking you to join my team. ;)

---

Paradise By The Dashboard Light - Meatloaf

I. Paradise

Boy:
I remember every little thing
As if it happened only yesterday
Parking by the lake
And there was not another car in sight
And I never had a girl
Looking any better than you did
And all the kids at school
They were wishing they were me that night

And now our bodies are oh so close and tight
It never felt so good, it never felt so right
And we're glowing like the metal on the edge of a knife
C'mon! Hold on tight!
C'mon! Hold on tight!

Though it's cold and lonely in the deep dark night
I can see paradise by the dashboard light

Girl:
Ain't no doubt about it
We were doubly blessed
Cause we were barely seventeen
And we were barely dressed

Ain't no doubt about it
Baby got to go and shout it
Ain't no doubt about it
We were doubly blessed

Boy:
Cause we were barely seventeen
And we were barely dressed

Baby doncha hear my heart
You got it drowning out the radio
I've been waiting so long
For you to come along and have some fun

And I gotta let ya know
No you're never gonna regret it
So open up your eyes I got a big surprise
It'll feel all right
Well I wanna make your motor run

And now our bodies are oh so close and tight
It never felt so good, it never felt so right
And we're glowing like the metal on the edge of a knife
C'mon! Hold on tight!
C'mon! Hold on tight!

Though it's cold and lonley in the deep dark night
I can see paradise by the dashboard light
Paradise by the dashboard light

You got to do what you can
And let Mother Nature do the rest
Ain't no doubt about it
We were doubly blessed
Cause we were barely seventeen
And we were barely--

We're gonna go all the way tonight
We're gonna go allt he way
An tonight's the night...

Radio Broadcast:
Ok, here we go, we got a real pressure cooker
going here, two down, nobody on, no score,
bottom of the ninth, there's the wind-up and
there it is, a line shot up the middle, look
at him go. This boy can really fly!
He's rounding first and really turning it on
now, he's not letting up at all, he's gonna
try for second; the ball is bobbled out in center,
and here comes the throw, and what a throw!
He's gonna slide in head first, here he comes, he's out!
No, wait, safe--safe at second base, this kid really
makes things happen out there.
Batter steps up to the plate, here's the pitch--
he's going, and what a jump he's got, he's trying
for third, here's the throw, it's in the dirt--
safe at third! Holy cow, stolen base!
He's taking a pretty big lead out there, almost
daring him to try and pick him off. The pitcher
glance over, winds up, and it's bunted, bunted
down the third base line, the suicide squeeze in on!
Here he comes, squeeze play, it's gonna be close,
here's the throw, there's the play at the plate,
holy cow, I think he's gonna make it!

II. Let Me Sleep On It

Girl:
Stop right there!
I gotta know right now!
Before we go any further--!

Do you love me?
Will you love me forever?
Do you need me?
Will you never leave me?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life?
Will you take me away and will you make me your wife?
Do you love me!?
Will you love me forever!?
Do you need me!?
Will you never leave me!?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life!?
Will you take me away and will you make me your wife!?
I gotta know right now
Before we go any further
Do you love me!!!?
Will you love me forever!!!?

Boy:
Let me sleep on it
Baby, baby let me sleep on it
Let me sleep on it
And I'll give you my answer in the morning

Let me sleep on it
Baby, baby let me sleep on it
Let me sleep on it
And I'll give you my answer in the morning

Let me sleep on it
Baby, baby let me sleep on it
Let me sleep on it
And I'll give you my answer in the morning

Girl:
I gotta know right now!
Do you love me?
Will you love me forever?
Do you need me?
Will you never leave me?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life?
Will you take me away and will you make me your wife?
I gotta know right now!
Before we go any further
Do you love me?
And will you love me forever?

Boy:
Let me sleep on it
Baby, baby let me sleep on it
Let me sleep on it
And I'll give you my answer in the morning
Let me sleep on it!!!

Girl:
Will you love me forever?

Boy:
Let me sleep on it!!!

Girl:
Will you love me forever!!!

III. Praying for the End of Time

Boy:
I couldn't take it any longer
Lord I was crazed
And when the feeling came upon me
Like a tidal wave
I started swearing to my god and on my mother's grave
That I would love you to the end of time
I swore that I would love you to the end of time!

So now I'm praying for the end of time
To hurry up and arrive
Cause if I gotta spend another minute with you
I don't think that I can really survive
I'll never break my promise or forget my vow
But God only knows what I can do right now
I'm praying for the end of time
It's all that I can do
Praying for the end of time, so I can end my time with you!!!

Boy:
It was long ago and it was far away
and it was so much better than it is today

Girl:
It never felt so good
It never felt so right
And we were glowing like
A metal on the edge of a knife

---

Life on earth is the global equivalent of not storing things in the fridge.

Simonator- interesting theme in your last few posts on this thread. That's ok, I'm sure the few I've put up paint a rather odd picture.

Everything Falls Apart- Dog's Eye View

Don't look now, things just got worse
I'm drunk again, I swear this present is just a curse
I got here, by killing off all my friends
I think I've figured out, my life begins when the fun ends
I got my weight, I'm free to do as I please
yeah I got my wings, now nothing really pleases me
til everything falls apart, then I get to try to put it back together
yeah falls apart, you can count on that
count on bad bad weather again

was it good, I don't remember much about it
when things start to feel right, you can count on me to start to doubt it
the devils not, in the details
oh no the devil is in my pants
it's shoot first appologize later, another quick end to a short shot romance
well I got what I wanted, now I don't for anything
yeah I got what I wanted, now my life is just boring
til everything falls apart,then I get to try to put it back together
yeah falls apart, you can count on that
you can count on bad bad weather thats here

I meet God this afternoon, riding on an up town train
I said, don't you have better things to do
he said, if I do my job what would you complain about
so I let him go to hell, now I'll have something to do
yeah I let him go to hell, does that sound familiar to you
well everything falls apart,then I get to try to put it back together
yeah falls apart, you can count on that
can count on bad bad weather, well everything that falls apart
baby sooner or later gonna come back together
well everything that come together
sooner or later gonna fall apart
well you can call it anything you want
their gonna take it all away from you
wake up, wake up, wake up scared
you'll find yourself thoughts decayed

---

Still looking for something profound or inspirational to place here.

These Are Days
Natalie Merchant & 10,000 Maniacs
The .MP3

These are the days
These are days you’ll remember
Never before and never since, I promise
Will the whole world be warm as this
And as you feel it,
You’ll know it’s true
That you are blessed and lucky
It’s true that you
Are touched by something
That will grow and bloom in you

These are days that you’ll remember
When May is rushing over you
With desire to be part of the miracles
You see in every hour
You’ll know it’s true
That you are blessed and lucky
It’s true that you are touched
By something that will grow and bloom in you

These are days
These are the days you might fill
With laughter until you break
These days you might feel
A shaft of light
Make its way across your face
And when you do
Then you’ll know how it was meant to be
See the signs and know their meaning
It's true
Then you’ll know how it was meant to be
Hear the signs and know they’re speaking
To you, to you

Sorry if this is a repost, but:

Brain Damage- Pink Floyd

The lunatic is on the grass
The lunatic is on the grass
Remembering games and daisy chains and laughs
Got to keep the loonies on the path

The lunatic is in the hall
The lunatics are in my hall
The paper holds their folded faces to the floor
And every day the paper boy brings more

And if the dam breaks open many years too soon
And if there is no room upon the hill
And if your head explodes with dark forbodings too
Ill see you on the dark side of the moon

The lunatic is in my head
The lunatic is in my head
You raise the blade, you make the change
You re-arrange me till Im sane
You lock the door
And throw away the key
Theres someone in my head but its not me.

And if the cloud bursts, thunder in your ear
You shout and no one seems to hear
And if the band youre in starts playing different tunes
Ill see you on the dark side of the moon

---

Still looking for something profound or inspirational to place here.

For an angel,

Cat Stevens Lyrics - Moon Shadow Lyrics

Oh, I'm bein' followed by a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin and hoppin' on a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow

And if I ever lose my hands, lose my plough, lose my land,
Oh if I ever lose my hands, Oh if.... I won't have to work no more.
And if I ever lose my eyes, if my colours all run dry,
Yes if I ever lose my eyes, Oh if.... I won't have to cry no more.

Oh, I'm bein' followed by a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin and hoppin' on a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow

And if I ever lose my legs, I won't moan, and I won't beg,
Yes if I ever lose my legs, Oh if.... I won't have to walk no more.
And if I ever lose my mouth, all my teeth, north and south,
Yes if I ever lose my mouth, Oh if.... I won't have to talk...

Did it take long to find me? I asked the faithful light.
Did it take long to find me? And are you gonna stay the night?

Oh, I'm bein' followed by a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin and hoppin' on a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow

---

I Desire Peace and Justice, Jim Scott (Mod-Ret.)

About me I think. ;-)THE BEATLES lyrics - "Nowhere Man"


www.OldieLyrics.com


(Lennon/McCartney)

He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody

Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?

Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command

He's as blind as he can be
Just sees what he wants to see
Nowhere Man can you see me at all?

Nowhere Man, don't worry
Take your time, don't hurry
Leave it all till somebody else lends you a hand

Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?

Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command

He's a real Nowhere Man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody




THE BEATLES - "Nowhere Man" lyrics

---

I Desire Peace and Justice, Jim Scott (Mod-Ret.)

Its My Life - Bon Jovi

This ain't a song for the broken-hearted
No silent prayer for the faith-departed
I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd
You're gonna hear my voice
When I shout it out loud

Chorus:
It's my life
It's now or never
I ain't gonna live forever
I just want to live while I'm alive
(It's my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just wanna live while I'm alive
It's my life

This is for the ones who stood their ground
For Tommy and Gina who never backed down
Tomorrow's getting harder make no mistake
Luck ain't even lucky
Got to make your own breaks

Chorus:
It's my life
And it's now or never
I ain't gonna live forever
I just want to live while I'm alive
(It's my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just want to live while I'm alive
'Cause it's my life

Better stand tall when they're calling you out
Don't bend, don't break, hell, don't back down

Chorus:
It's my life
And it's now or never
'Cause I ain't gonna live forever
I just want to live while I'm alive
(It's my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just want to live while I'm alive

Chorus:
It's my life
And it's now or never
'Cause I ain't gonna live forever
I just want to live while I'm alive
(It's my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just want to live while I'm alive
'Cause it's my life

---

Life on earth is the global equivalent of not storing things in the fridge.

The Science of Selling Yourself Short - Less Than Jake

I've come to my senses
That I've become senseless
I could give you lessons on how to ruin your friendships
Every last conviction, I smoked them all away
I drank my frustrations down the drain, out of the way
So I sit and wait and wonder,
"Does anyone else feel like me?"
Someone so tired of their routines and disappearing self-esteems

I'll sing along,
Yeah with every emergency,
Just sing along,
I'm the king of catastrophies,
I'm so far gone,
That deep down inside I think it's fine by me,
I'm my own worst enemy.

I could be an expert on co-dependency
I could write the best book on underage tragedy
I've been spending my time at the local liquor store
I've been sleeping nightly on my best friends kitchen floor
So I sit and wait and wonder,
"Does anyone else feel like me?"
I'm so over-dosed on apathy and burnt out on sympathy.

Let the meaning slip away
Lost my faith in another day,
Self deprecation seems okay,
I never thought I'd make it anyway
I'm my own worst enemy.