The primary care nurses work 12 hour shifts in the ICU at the hospital my mother is in, and I've gotten to know 5 of them. Two in particular are super sweet and really truly care about how my mother is doing and getting her better. The other three are a little detached, but very professional. I think all of them are giving my mom the best care she can get.

For any of you who have kids, I am sure you look at them and you analyze and ponder and wonder about them all the time. I never studied my mother in detail like that until her illness, but now I see so much of myself in her, it makes me smile.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

The primary care nurses work 12 hour shifts in the ICU at the hospital my mother is in, and I've gotten to know 5 of them. Two in particular are super sweet and really truly care about how my mother is doing and getting her better. The other three are a little detached, but very professional. I think all of them are giving my mom the best care she can get.

For any of you who have kids, I am sure you look at them and you analyze and ponder and wonder about them all the time. I never studied my mother in detail like that until her illness, but now I see so much of myself in her, it makes me smile.

:) It made me smile too! I'm glad she's been doing a bit better in the last few days, and that you can trust that the nurses are wanting the same for her as you do. :)

Im glad you are getting to know the nurses. They have one tough job to do. Im thinking the ones who seem more detached have been in ICU longetr than the other ones?
And I wish your mom to be strong and well.

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Old James

The primary care nurses work 12 hour shifts in the ICU at the hospital my mother is in, and I've gotten to know 5 of them. Two in particular are super sweet and really truly care about how my mother is doing and getting her better. The other three are a little detached, but very professional. I think all of them are giving my mom the best care she can get.

For any of you who have kids, I am sure you look at them and you analyze and ponder and wonder about them all the time. I never studied my mother in detail like that until her illness, but now I see so much of myself in her, it makes me smile.

That's nice to hear Gordon:) I bet your mum is a lovely woman. I will pray for you guys.

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rOZZ
Music
Pictures

Im glad you are getting to know the nurses. They have one tough job to do. Im thinking the ones who seem more detached have been in ICU longetr than the other ones?

Yes, I hate to say it, but the younger nurses do seem more "into" the job. I can't fathom doing that job for one minute, but there is a certain youthful enthusiasm I get from the ones who I imagine are newer. One of the older nurses was kind of funny the other day... she was rattling on to the pulmonologist about this, that and the other, and generally being a negative nelly. The doctor pretty much blew her off; I could tell he was a little weary of that particular nurse's style.

On another note, it amazes me with all these millions of dollars in medical devices, the nurses and docs still have those old-fashioned stethoscopes hanging around their necks.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

Thanks for reading/listening to me. I've felt very lost and scared ever since this situation began last month, and I turned to this thread because well, the theme of PTSD seemed to fit what I was going through.

The general consensus amongst the docs right now is my mother is making slow but steady progress, and they are going to move her out of the ICU soon, and into a hospital that specializes in respiratory care to get her weaned off the breathing and feeding tubes. It's amazing her back injury devolved into this, but as we all know, life is a very fragile thing.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

Thanks for reading/listening to me. I've felt very lost and scared ever since this situation began last month, and I turned to this thread because well, the theme of PTSD seemed to fit what I was going through.

The general consensus amongst the docs right now is my mother is making slow but steady progress, and they are going to move her out of the ICU soon, and into a hospital that specializes in respiratory care to get her weaned off the breathing and feeding tubes. It's amazing her back injury devolved into this, but as we all know, life is a very fragile thing.

It certainly is. Even minor problems can lead to a host of unforseen chain reactions... a stubbed toe leads to a funny walk which leads to a dodgy knee which leads to a bad back - often within just a few minutes of staggering out of bed :) Hopefully once she is back on the path to better physical health you'll see an improvement in other ways too. :)

Not to mention charlie horses, which I get in My right calf from time to time... I then have to get up and walk on the leg, that's only slightly less painful than a broken leg in My opinion and yes, I've had one on My left leg, that's where I have 3 titanium screws at. Resistance is futile...

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The T1 Trust, PRR T1 Class 4-4-4-4 #5550, 1 of America's First HST's

Im glad you are getting to know the nurses. They have one tough job to do. Im thinking the ones who seem more detached have been in ICU longetr than the other ones?

Yes, I hate to say it, but the younger nurses do seem more "into" the job. I can't fathom doing that job for one minute, but there is a certain youthful enthusiasm I get from the ones who I imagine are newer. One of the older nurses was kind of funny the other day... she was rattling on to the pulmonologist about this, that and the other, and generally being a negative nelly. The doctor pretty much blew her off; I could tell he was a little weary of that particular nurse's style.

On another note, it amazes me with all these millions of dollars in medical devices, the nurses and docs still have those old-fashioned stethoscopes hanging around their necks.

Im guessing that the newer nurses in ICU havent seen the constant death of patients they have come to know and like. Or have seen the patients families grieve over a lost loved one.
I think Ive told part of this story in an above thread. But I will retell it.
My wife was in a coma right from her car accident. So the nurses that took care of her, Never had any interaction with her, Just with me. I thought at first the day nurse was cold hearted. I worked second shift at the time From 4:30 PM until 12:30 AM. I would go home grab some sleep and be with my wife about 5 hours before I had to leave for work. I did that everyday for 13 days straight.
I got to know that so called cold hearted nurse. We talked a lot.
I asked her how long she had been in ICU. She told me 7 years. I made a statement that it must be tough seeing patients die all the time. I didnt get an answer But I read her expressian. She did tell me that she was waiting for a transfer to the baby ward.
I was there on a sunday morning, So was that same nurse. She was the one who told me that my wife didnt have much time left. After it was all over and it was time to leave. I thanked that nurse for careing for my wife and me.

I still think about her now and then. My wife died back in 90. I was 39 at the time,The nurse was younegr than I was. I sure hope she got her transfer.
From watching people die to watching new life come into the world.

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Old James

'Watching people die', every month I did that from March 2004 to May 2005, about 2 weeks before June was to roll around, it ended and I couldn't go there to say goodbye, though I did attend the funeral. Sigh...

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The T1 Trust, PRR T1 Class 4-4-4-4 #5550, 1 of America's First HST's

I've nothing but admiration for the Macmillan nurses that work in Hospices here.

So do I Chris. But It sure has to take a toll on them. Being as I was in the fire service for close to 20 years. Ive seen my share of death, But nowhere near what they see weekly. My hat is off to them, And bless them too.

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Old James

Just talked to a doctor this morning who told me they see situations like my mom's all the time... an injury, in her case, the back, that sends people into a downward spiral and there's a 60% mortality in 6 months. Gee, thanks doc. I told him my mother was going to be in the other 40%. He just said, ok... and walked off.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

Just talked to a doctor this morning who told me they see situations like my mom's all the time... an injury, in her case, the back, that sends people into a downward spiral and there's a 60% mortality in 6 months. Gee, thanks doc. I told him my mother was going to be in the other 40%. He just said, ok... and walked off.

He was just trying to be truthful, not tactful.
The fact is that aged mortality often comes from an injury that the body can no longer heal itself from rather than from truly causes of age itself.
Please try to forgive your mother's physician. With all their training, sometimes they have a hard time defining things that others do not wish to hear.

I send all prayers and His healing powers to your mother nonetheless.

God bless, Gordon.

Mark

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"Freedom is just Chaos, with better lighting." Alan Dean Foster

Just talked to a doctor this morning who told me they see situations like my mom's all the time... an injury, in her case, the back, that sends people into a downward spiral and there's a 60% mortality in 6 months. Gee, thanks doc. I told him my mother was going to be in the other 40%. He just said, ok... and walked off.

He was just trying to be truthful, not tactful.
The fact is that aged mortality often comes from an injury that the body can no longer heal itself from rather than from truly causes of age itself.
Please try to forgive your mother's physician. With all their training, sometimes they have a hard time defining things that others do not wish to hear.

I send all prayers and His healing powers to your mother nonetheless.

God bless, Gordon.

Mark

Thank you, Mark. I think what you just said sums it up exactly. It sure irritated me, though. I paused and stared at him because I just couldn't believe he was being so blunt and cold(with a smile on his face no less!).

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

I've nothing but admiration for the Macmillan nurses that work in Hospices here.

So do I Chris. But It sure has to take a toll on them. Being as I was in the fire service for close to 20 years. Ive seen my share of death, But nowhere near what they see weekly. My hat is off to them, And bless them too.

I have a friend who an ICU nurse. I took her some time to be able to "detach" herself from the treatment, the prognosis for the patient and the live person in front of her - there were many tears during the process, and more recently when the wife of one of her patients stopped her as she came off shift and handed her a huge bunch of flowers and said "Thank you for the way you are looking after my husband". As she said its things like that that make her job less difficult.

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Bob Smith
Member of Seti PIPPS (Pluto is a Planet Protest Society)
Somewhere in the (un)known Universe?

Just talked to a doctor this morning who told me they see situations like my mom's all the time... an injury, in her case, the back, that sends people into a downward spiral and there's a 60% mortality in 6 months. Gee, thanks doc. I told him my mother was going to be in the other 40%. He just said, ok... and walked off.

Gordan I would say that all depends on the will of the 60%. There are some folks who just give up, That is why they die. Now In not saying that if you have stage 4 cancer you can will yourself to live, But I bet that has happend.

I see so often see that when one spouse dies the other does to in a short amount of time. To tell the truth after my second wife died I didnt really care about life either. So I can understand how some couples who have been married for over 50 years feel.

I dont know how old your mom is. But I hope she is a fighter and proves the DR. wrong. Best wishes for her and you.

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Old James

Just talked to a doctor this morning who told me they see situations like my mom's all the time... an injury, in her case, the back, that sends people into a downward spiral and there's a 60% mortality in 6 months. Gee, thanks doc. I told him my mother was going to be in the other 40%. He just said, ok... and walked off.

He was just trying to be truthful, not tactful.
The fact is that aged mortality often comes from an injury that the body can no longer heal itself from rather than from truly causes of age itself.
Please try to forgive your mother's physician. With all their training, sometimes they have a hard time defining things that others do not wish to hear.

I send all prayers and His healing powers to your mother nonetheless.

God bless, Gordon.

Mark

Thank you, Mark. I think what you just said sums it up exactly. It sure irritated me, though. I paused and stared at him because I just couldn't believe he was being so blunt and cold(with a smile on his face no less!).

I am sorry, Gordon, that I cannot do more.
I think he may have been cold because he simply had done all he could and was trying to insulate himself from the further pain that you may have to endure.
I could not possibly put myself in his situation. Nor could I possibly save some of the lives that he may possibly be able to. It must be rather hard to be in that position. Impossibly so, in my estimation. Please give your and her doctor your utmost respect for the position they are in. I just cannot put myself ever in their shoes.

God bless.

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"Freedom is just Chaos, with better lighting." Alan Dean Foster

Just talked to a doctor this morning who told me they see situations like my mom's all the time... an injury, in her case, the back, that sends people into a downward spiral and there's a 60% mortality in 6 months. Gee, thanks doc. I told him my mother was going to be in the other 40%. He just said, ok... and walked off.

Gordan I would say that all depends on the will of the 60%. There are some folks who just give up, That is why they die. Now In not saying that if you have stage 4 cancer you can will yourself to live, But I bet that has happend.

I see so often see that when one spouse dies the other does to in a short amount of time. To tell the truth after my second wife died I didnt really care about life either. So I can understand how some couples who have been married for over 50 years feel.

I dont know how old your mom is. But I hope she is a fighter and proves the DR. wrong. Best wishes for her and you.

Then you'd know what My grandpa felt, after His 2nd wife died, it took Him a about a year, She died in 68 and He in 69 at the end of the year. His house is still intact, one day I may go and see the place and ask for a walk in tour of the place, a one bedroom house with a bedroom over the garage with 3 bathrooms total on the property, My Dad grew up in the bedroom over the garage and the living room is dinky, I think My kitchen is not much bigger than that. Most cars today can't use that old garage as it was designed for a FORD Model A type car, though My Escort zx2 sport Hot coupe would fit.

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The T1 Trust, PRR T1 Class 4-4-4-4 #5550, 1 of America's First HST's

Chris, thank you for sharing that. I can't imagine being in your father's shoes or yours in a time like that. I was asked initially when my mom was first admitted to the ICU a couple weeks ago if I wanted her on a ventilator and feeding tube, and I said of course, not really knowing what the future held, but she's now down to just what they call a T-tube, which means she's breathing on her own, but there is a tube down to her lungs to remove mucous accumulations. She's still on the feeding tube, but she said she was hungry yesterday, and wanted some Easter candy this morning, so those are good signs to me! The problem is, she still can't talk because of the trach balloon in her throat. In the next day or so, she's going to transfer out of ICU into specialized respiratory care where she'll get weaned off those tubes, and PT and OT can commence in ernest.

I get very anxious before I see her every morning, worried about how her condition will be, but she was really happy to see me this morning, and did her best to give me a hug. She also told me I need to take her to Kroger(the grocery) tomorrow. I think she's hungry, lol. I didn't stay real long this morning because she said she wanted to go to bed. I told her that wouldn't be a problem, lol.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

In the face of the inevitable, Chris, one must do the right thing.
I have not had to face this in human terms, but I don't think that having my Squirrel kitty pass in my hands was so distant from what you had to face.
Yes, only a kitty, but you must take into account the fact the I have never had any human offspring, so......my cats ARE my life's care and content.

It was devastating to me, and I am STILL trying every day to deal with it.
When I walked back there the other day, I simply limped to the ground and cried for an hour or more. No greater grief could be held between a father and child than that day.

I do not posture. I do not cry for the sake of pity. That was love lost that cannot ever be recovered. Always remembered, but not held again. Her eyes, that last moment here on this earth, thanking me for letting her go.
That shall live forever in myself.

Rest in peace, my kitty Squirrel. I have 3 of your half sisters that need me and love me as much as you did. And they do it well.

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"Freedom is just Chaos, with better lighting." Alan Dean Foster