Posts by Michael Belanger, W1DGL

1) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 94 (Message 1909261)
Posted 24 days ago by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
cove
2) Message boards : Cafe SETI : The joke thread Part 4. (Message 1909260)
Posted 24 days ago by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized She was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, “Business trip or pleasure?”

She turned, smiled and said, “Business. I’m going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston."

He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen Sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs!

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, “What’s your Business at this convention?”

“Lecturer,” she responded. “I use information that I have learned from my Personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.”

“Really?” he said. “And what kind of myths are there?”

“Well,” she explained, “one popular myth is that African-American men are The most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is That Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Mexican Descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with Absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck.”

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed.. “I’m Sorry,” she said, “I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don’t even know your name.”

“Tonto,” the man said, “Tonto Gonzales, but my friends call me Bubba".
3) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Beet's Give us a Caption - number 67 (Message 1894296)
Posted 9 Oct 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
I think I might be over the limit.
4) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 93 (Message 1894295)
Posted 9 Oct 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Wall
5) Message boards : News : Arecibo Status (Message 1891384)
Posted 22 Sep 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Here's a National Geographic article: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/2017/09/arecibo-radio-telescope-damaged-puerto-rico-hurricane-maria-science/
6) Message boards : Cafe SETI : TLPTPHW #265 - Jelly Babies For Everyone!!! :-) (Message 1885685)
Posted 23 Aug 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Good afternoon (well, for the western US) win!
7) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 92 (Message 1885684)
Posted 23 Aug 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Australian
8) Message boards : Cafe SETI : 2017 Total Eclipse Plans (Message 1885683)
Posted 23 Aug 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
As I understand it, you'd have to be traveling at Mach 1.5 or slightly faster to follow the shadow.
9) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 92 (Message 1883015)
Posted 10 Aug 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Klingon
10) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 92 (Message 1881989)
Posted 4 Aug 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Safka
11) Message boards : Cafe SETI : The joke thread Part 4. (Message 1881836)
Posted 3 Aug 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
A man decided to spend the night with a prostitute.

When it was over she told him to pay $500. He said he’d send it to her in an envelope marked “Rent for Apartment.”

The next day, however, he regretted that he spent the night with her and sent only $250. When she wrote him a letter asking why he didn’t pay full price, he wrote her a memo saying:
"Dear lady, I am including a check for $250 for your rent. I am not sending you the sum we previously agreed on, as before I rented the apartment I was given the impression that:

1. The apartment had not been used before.

2. It had adequate heating.

3. It was small enough for me to feel comfortable in it.

Instead, I found the apartment had been used many times before, had no heating and was too big for me!"

Quite pleased with himself, he sends the letter.

A few days later the prostitute responds in her own letter, saying the following:

"Dear Sir,

1. You should have known such a beautiful apartment had been rented before.

2. The apartment did have adequate heating. You just didn’t know how to turn it on.

3. The apartment was the perfect size. You just didn’t have large enough furniture to fill it.

You are hereby asked to pay the rent in full or I will be forced to contact your current landlady!"
12) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 92 (Message 1881823)
Posted 3 Aug 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Thunderbolt
13) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 92 (Message 1875688)
Posted 29 Jun 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
natural
14) Message boards : Cafe SETI : The joke thread Part 4. (Message 1875681)
Posted 29 Jun 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Funny for Thursday...

A desperate looking woman stood poised on the edge of a high bridge, about to jump off.

An old homeless guy who was wandering by stopped and said, "Look, since you'll be dead in a few minutes, and it won't matter to you, how about a quickie before you go?"

She screamed, "NO! Bug off you filthy old bastard!"

He shrugged and turned away saying, "Okay then,
I'll just go and wait at the bottom."

She didn't jump.

Lesson: Suicide counseling really does work
15) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Seti Science Fiction Book Club (Message 1873939)
Posted 19 Jun 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
16) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Beet's Give us a Caption - number 67 (Message 1873934)
Posted 19 Jun 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
Downtown Phoenix this week!
17) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 92 (Message 1873933)
Posted 19 Jun 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
carpet
18) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 92 (Message 1871183)
Posted 5 Jun 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
professor
19) Message boards : Cafe SETI : Word Link # 91 (Message 1866046)
Posted 7 May 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
complement(s)
20) Message boards : Cafe SETI : The joke thread Part 4. (Message 1866045)
Posted 7 May 2017 by Profile Michael Belanger, W1DGL
Post:
The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40’s or early 50’s.
“May I help you?” she asked.
“I want to see Valerie,” the man replied.
“Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else,” said the madam.
“No, I must see Valerie,” was the man’s reply.
Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $1,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out ten one-hundred dollar bills, gave them to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left.
The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that none had ever come back two nights in a row–too expensive–and there were no discounts. The price was still $1,000. Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.
The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for the third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs. After their session, Valerie questioned the man. “No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?” she asked.
The man replied, ” South Carolina.”
“Really” she said. “I have family in South Carolina.”
“I know,” the man said. “Your father died, and I am your sister’s attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000 inheritance.”
The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:
1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawyer


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