---

The last one I'm doing...

------------------------------------------------------------

JANET
I was feeling done in / Couldn't win
I'd only ever kissed before

COLUMBIA (to Magenta)
You mean she--

MAGENTA
Uh-huh.

JANET
I thought there's no use getting / into heavy petting
It only leads to trouble and / seat wetting.
Now all I want to know / is how to go
I've tasted blood / and I want more

COLUMBIA and MAGENTA
More! More! More! More!

JANET
I'll put up no resistance / I want to stay the distance
I've got an itch to scratch / I need assistance.
Touch-a touch-a touch-a / touch me -
I wanna be / dirty
Thrill me, chill me / fulfil me,
creature of / the night.

Then if anything grows (giggle) / while you pose,
I'll oil you up / and rub you down

COLUMBIA and MAGENTA
Down! Down! Down! Down!

JANET
And that's just one small fraction / of the main attraction
You need a friendly hand - Oh! / and I need action.
Touch-a touch-a touch-a / touch me -
I wanna be / dirty
Thrill me, chill me / fulfil me,
creature of / the night.

COLUMBIA (mocking)
Touch-a touch-a touch-a / touch me.

MAGENTA (also mocking)
I wanna be dirty.

COLUMBIA
Thrill me, chill me, / fulfil me.

MAGENTA
Creature of / the night.

JANET
Touch-a touch-a touch-a / touch me -
I wanna be / dirty
Thrill me, chill me / fulfil me,
creature of / the ni-i-i-i-ight.

ROCKY
Creature of the night.

BRAD
Creature of the night.

FRANK
Creature of the night.

RIFF-RAFF
Creature of the night.

MAGENTA
Creature of the night.

COLUMBIA
Creature of the night.

ROCKY
Creature of the night.

JANET
Creature of the night!

------------------------------------------------------------

Next time, I'm putting up the real lyrics - Censorship and prior restraint be damned!

---

> I can't sing the "Charles Atlas" line without going AP...
>
> Anyway... who's gonna do the song??? Can't be anyone we've had
> before... it'd break character...

Go on, be daring... do the AP as well.

There's enough people reading this thread without posting... how long before someone else will crack?

I can't sing the "Charles Atlas" line without going AP...

Anyway... who's gonna do the song??? Can't be anyone we've had before... it'd break character...

---

I like my ice bucket :)

But you didn't finish it!!!!

FRANK: One from the vaults.
RIFF RAFF drags EDDIE's dismembered body back into the fridge.
FRANK: And so perish all those who reject my love!
ROCKY cowers in terror.
FRANK: Oh no, my little Adonis - you're much too beautiful to be destroyed.
He had a certain naive charm - but no muscle.
ROCKY flexes.

FRANK: But a deltoid
And a bicep,
A hot groin
And a tricep
Makes me - ooh - shake.
Makes me want to take Charles Atlas By the ha-and.
In just seven days -
Oh baby -

GUESTS, RIFF RAFF, MAGENTA & COLUMBIA & FRANK:
I can make you a ma-ha-ha-ha-haan.
I don't want no dissension
Just dynamic tension.
In just seven days
I can make you a ma-ha-ha-ha-haan.
In just seven days
I can make you a ma-ha-ha-ha-haaan.

Dammit, now it sounds like that lot could be sung by sheep!!!!

I'll take "Whatever Happened to Saturday Night". .o0(Actually, I jumped the gun and forgot "Charles Atlas"... oops!)

Oh, t'heck with it... I'll do both... !-)

FRANK
♪ A weakling weighing / ninety eight pounds
will get sand in his face / when kicked to the ground.
And soon in the gym, / with a determined chin,
the sweat from his pores / as he works for his cau-u-u-use ♫

♬ Will make him glisten / and gleam
and with massage / and just a little bit of
Ste-e-e- / -e-e-eam
He'll be pink / and quite clean. ♪

♫ He'll be a strong man ♬ - Oh, honey! -

GUESTS, RIFF, MAGENTA, COLUMBIA, FRANK
♪ But the wrong man. ♫

FRANK
♬ He'll eat nutritious high protein / and swallow raw eggs.
Try to build up his shoulders / His chest, arms and legs.
Such an effort - / If he only knew of my plan.
In just seven days... ♪

GUESTS, RIFF, MAGENTA, COLUMBIA, FRANK
♫ ...I can make you a ma-a-a-a-an ♬

FRANK
♪ He'll do press-ups and chin-ups, / do the snatch, clean and jerk.
He thinks dynamic tension / Must be hard work.
Such strenuous living / I just don't understand.
When, in just seven days ♫ - Oh baby! -
♬ I can make you / a ma-a-a-a-an. ♪

A large refrigeration door slowly opens, falling like a
drawbridge.  Inside is a wall of ice.  Through this bursts
an icy EDDIE riding a motorcycle and carrying a saxophone.

[b]COLUMBIA[/b] (racing to meet him)
Eddie!

EDDIE
♪ Whatever happened to / Saturday night
when you dressed up sharp / and you felt alright?
It don't seem the same / since cosmic light
came into my life / and I thought I was divine. ♫

♬ I used to go for a ride / with a chick who'd go
and listen to the music on the / radio.
A saxophone was blowing / on a rock and roll show
and we climbed in the back / and we really had a good ti-i-i-ime ♪

GUESTS
♫ Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll! ♬

EDDIE
♪ My head used to swim / from the perfume I smelled.
My hands kind of fumbled with her / white plastic belt.
I'd taster her baby pink lipstick, / and that's when I'd melt.
And she'd whisper in my ear / tonight she really was mine. ♫

♬ Get back in front and put / some hair oil on.
Buddy Holly was singing / his very last song.
With your arms around your girl / you'd try to sing along
It felt pretty good - Whoo! / Really had a good ti-i-i-ime. ♪

ALL except for FRANK, BRAD, JANET, and ROCKY
♫ Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll! ♬

FRANK steals towards the fridge where he collects an ice
pick, innocently...

♪ Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll!
Hot patootie! / Bless my soul!
I really love that / rock and roll! ♫

On the last chorus FRANK rushes to EDDIE with the ice pick,
in a demented fury.  The GUESTS are unbelieving. COLUMBIA
and JANET scream.  EDDIE is dead.  COLUMBIA cries, hands
covering her face.  BRAD holds JANET close to him. FRANK
walks away from EDDIE's body unconcerned. MAGENTA is very
bored and picking up ice cubes and placing them in the
ice bucket.

[b]FRANK[/b]
One from the vaults.

[i][b]AUDIENCE[/b]
A creature from the freezer like a bat out of hell!![/i]

.o0(I hadda get that line in!)

---

Let me (ahem) step in here:

The Sword of Damocles is hanging over my head
And I've got the feeling someone's going to be cutting the thread.
Oh, woe is me.
My life is a misery.
Oh, can't you see
That I'm at the start of a pretty big downer....
I woke up this morning with a start when I fell out of bed.
(That ain't no crime.)
And left from my dreaming was a feeling of un-nameable dread.
(That ain't no crime)
My high is low.
I'm dressed up with no place to go.
And all I know
Is I'm at the start of a pretty big downer.
(Sha la la la that ain't no crime.)
Oh, no no, no no.
(Sha la la la that ain't no crime.)
No no no, no no.
(Sha la la la that ain't no crime - that ain't no crime.)

> I disclaim any and all affiliation with any of you.
>
> This goes for ewe, too...

sheepish look

I've already done the unabridged Sweet Transvestite with commentary, so...

Is Misfit doing "Sword of Damocles" or "Hot Patootie"?

---

Well, dang it, if nobody else is going to get around to it...

Riff Raff:
It's astounding
Time is fleeting
Madness takes its toll
But listen closely

Magenta:
Not for very much longer

Riff Raff:
I've got to keep control
(singing)
I remember doing the Time Warp
Drinking those moments when
The blackness would hit me

Riff and Magenta:
And the void would be calling

Chorus:
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Criminologist:
It's just a jump to the left

Chorus:
And then a step to the right

Criminologist:
With your hands on your hips

Chorus:
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Magenta:
It's so dreamy
Oh, fantasy free me
So you can't see me
No, not at all
In another dimension
With voyeuristic intention
Well secluded, I see all

Riff Raff:
With a bit of a mind flip

Magenta:
You're into the time slip

Riff Raff:
And nothing can ever be the same

Magenta:
You're spaced out on sensation

Riff Raff:
Like you're under sedation

Chorus:
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Columbia:
Well I was walking down the street
Just a having a think
When a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink
He shook-a me up, he took me by surprise
He had a pick up truck and the devil's eyes
He stared at me and I felt a change
Time meant nothing, never would again

Chorus:
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Criminologist:
It's just a jump to the left

Chorus:
And then a step to the right

Criminologist:
With your hands on your hips

Chorus:
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane

Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

I disclaim any and all affiliation with any of you.

This goes for ewe, too...

---

[url=http://mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/thefinalfrontear/animalsextsktsk.gif?0.9075272759514503]Did you mean this?<a>

---

"I'm trying to maintain a shred of dignity in this world." - Me

---

Account frozen...

&#x266a; [i]In the velvet darkness / of the blackest night</I>     JANET
[i]burning bright, / there's a guiding star - 
No matter what / or who you are.[/i] &#x266b;

&#x266c; [i]There's a light /[/i]                                  JANET & BRAD
[i]               / over at the Frankenstein place.[/i] &#x266a;   PHANTOM CHORUS

&#x266b; <I>There's a light /[/i]                                  JANET & BRAD
[i]               / Burning in the fireplace.[/i] &#x266b;         PHANTOM CHORUS

&#x266c; [i]There's a light / a light[/i]                          JANET
[i]In the darkness / of everybody's life[/i] &#x266a;

&#x266a; [i]The darkness / must go[/i]                             RIFF RAFF
[i]down the river / of night's dreaming[/i]
[i]Flow Morphia / slow[/i]
[i]Let the sun / and light come[/i]
[i]streaming / into my li-i-i-i-fe[/i] &#x266b; (bis)

&#x266a; [i]There's a light /[/i]                                  JANET & BRAD
[i]               / over at the Frankenstein place.[/i] &#x266b;   PHANTOM CHORUS

&#x266c; <I>There's a light /[/i]                                  JANET & BRAD
[i]               / Burning in the fireplace.[/i] &#x266a;         PHANTOM CHORUS

&#x266b; [i]There's a light / a light[/i]                          JANET & BRAD
In the darkness / of everybody's life[/i] &#x266c;[list=1]And so it seemed that Fortune has smiled upon Brad and Janet,
and that they had found the assistance that their plight
required.

Or had they?...[/list]

---

>

---

"I'm trying to maintain a shred of dignity in this world." - Me

---

Account frozen...

> Here you are, just leave the sheep jokes out. :)
>

Sorry, couldn't help myself!

---

"I'm trying to maintain a shred of dignity in this world." - Me

> I'm trying to keep this at R16 level...
> Oh, yeah - Drain the fun out of it, why don'cha? :-)
Hmm.. and you boys wonder why the girls don't want to come out and play. It's because you lot scare them off!!!!

> Fine... last post, then I've got to sleep...
Fairy nuff.

Umm.. the dialog really lengthens this, so pretend you've watched the wedding scene (this would be much better in Lego (tm)) and now it's onto the next song:
Hey Janet.
Yes Brad.
I've got something to say.
Uh huh.
I really loved the skilful way
You beat the other girls
To the bride's bouquet.
Oh Brad.
The river was deep but I swam it. Janet.
The future is ours so let's plan it. Janet.
So please don't tell me to can it. Janet.
I've one thing to say and that's dammit, Janet, I love you.
The road was long but I ran it. Janet.
There's a fire in my heart And you fan it. Janet.
If there's one fool for you Then I am it. Janet.
I've one thing to say and that's, dammit, Janet. I love you.
Here's a ring to prove that I'm no joker.
There's three ways that love can grow.
That's good bad or mediocre.
Oh - J - A - N - E - T, I love you so.

Oh!......It's nicer than Betty Munroe had
Oh Brad.
Now we're engaged and I'm so glad.
Oh Brad.
That you met Mom and you know Dad.
Oh Brad.
I've one thing to say and that's, Brad, I'm mad, for you too.

Oh, Brad.
Oh Dammit.
I'm mad.....
Oh Janet
For you.
I love you too-oo-oo.
There's one thing left to do-ah-ooh

And that's go see the man who began it
Janet.
When we met in his science exam it
Janet.
Made me give you the eye and then panic,
Janet
I've got one thing to say, and that's Dammit, Janet. I love you.
Dammit, Janet.
Oh Brad, I'm mad.
Dammit, Janet.
I love you.

I'm trying to keep this at R16 level...
Oh, yeah - Drain the fun out of it, why don'cha? :-)

Fine... last post, then I've got to sleep...

&#x266a; Science Fiction / double feature
Dr X will / build a creature
See Androids fighting / Brad and Janet
Anne Francis stars in / Forbidden Planet
Oh-oh-oh-o-o-o-o
At the late-night / double-feature
Picture Show / By RKO
Oh-oh-oh-o-o-o-o
At the late night / double feature
Picture Show / In the back row
At the late night / double feature
Picture Show / I want to go.
To the late night / double feature
Picture / show &#x266b;

.o0(Zzzzzz...)

---

I'm trying to keep this at R16 level... :)

I knew Leo G. Carrol
Was over a barrel
When tarantula took to the hills
And I really got hot
When I saw Jeanette Scott
Fight a Triffid that spits poison and kills
Dana Andrews said prunes
Gave him the runes
And passing them used lots of skills.
And when worlds collide
Said George Pal to his bride
I'm going to give you some terrible trills
Like a -