The gas and electric service is still in my dad's name, here. My mother never had the name changed after he died in 1982. Same with the phone. Strangely enough, though, the water was in her name, so like a dummie, I called the water company and told them she had died, and can I please have the service changed to my name. They wanted to charge me $30, and justified that by the fact they would have to come out and read the meter one final time under her name before changing it to mine. I got angry, told them they were greedy something elses, and to just let it stay in her name! Unfortunately though, since I let the cat out of the bag she's dead, they have to change it to "The Estate of ...". Fine, whatever. I'll just leave it that way forever.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

As far as the Royal Mail is concerned, redirection of mail has been the same for many years with hardly any change. Sounds like someone got out of bed the wrong side that day. It happens. Unfortunately, it always seems to happen at the wrong times.

Firstly it is technically impossible to redirect calls from a telephone line that doesn't exist to redirect calls from.

Who says the line would not exist, why can't they have the line terminate in the exchange and not in my dads bungalow. I worked for BT for 22 years and even then we had lines that were equipment only and not connected to a phone in a house or office. I know modern PABX's have been able to provide a service like that as we used it when I worked for Patientline/Hospedia.

So if a modern BT exchange cannot be programmed to send all calls from one number to another, even if there is no phone connected, they they are many , many years behind modern switching.

I would be quite happy to pay for that but seems BT don't need the extra revenue it might generate, but I suspect it is just too much trouble.

Where all this other crap you mention came from I have no idea.

On the form you have to fill in to get the redirect

I am applying for a Redirection on behalf of someone:
Who has died.

We need to see the original death certificate or interim death
certificate or an office copy (which you can get from the Register of Births,
Marriages and Deaths). We also need to see identification in the name of the
person applying, as shown in section 6.


Section 6

1 valid proof of to address from this list dated in the last 6 months:
• 2 different utility bills (NOT a mobile phone or a store/charge
card statement or bills printed from the internet)
• Original credit card statement
• Original mortgage statement
• Bank or building society statement or passbook.

AND

1 valid form of proof of name of person applying for the
Redirection from this list dated in the last 6 months:
• Credit/debit card
• Bank/building society book
• Passport
• Driving licence - photo card
• EU member state identity card.

AND

Original death certificate
or interim death certificate
(or a certified office copy)

OR

Power Of Attorney Document
certified by a solicitor
(or a certified office copy)

For your security we need to verify your identity to set up your Redirection. We require different
forms of identification depending on how you apply and if your mail is also to be redirected.
Proof of Identification must be from the items listed above, no other items are acceptable.

Perhaps things have changed, or perhaps you had paper bills and didn't think about it.

A few years ago it would not have been a problem for me to produce paper bills, not now however.

So I was booked on the 6.25 am ferry today from Yarmouth to Lymington for what I hope is my penultimate trip.

I packed some stuff into the car yesterday evening but left the valuable stuff for the morning. I retired early and woke just before 5 am to find an e-mail on my phone.

It said in bold "Important: Change to your Wightlink Journey."

Basically it said due to a mechanical failure the Yarmouth to Lymington service was suspended and I was re-booked onto the 7.00 am from Fishbourne.

Whilst annoying it was not a real problem as Fishbourne was about 35 minutes away so I left at the same time. On passing Yarmouth I observed the ferry Wight Sky was docked on the ramp, and the truth dawned it had broken down in the berth so no ferries could get in or out. Now "broken down" was a bit of an understatment.

Ferry service suspended after fire

The chatty guy who scanned my ticket at Fishbourne said it was an explosion in the engine room and the engineer was showered with hot metal!!

He said it had been serviced just two days ago by an outside contractor, wonder how long it will be out of service.

Still it didn't actually hold me up at all rather than the M27-M3-A31-M25 I chose M27-A3-M2 and got home same as last time.

Whilst many people will think I am mad, having left the scenic delight of the Isle of Wight for south London, I have to say "be it ever so humble there is no place like home."

"be it ever so humble there is no place like home."
So true!

Bernie, I am hoping to read soon that a south London stray kitty cat has found you.

"be it ever so humble there is no place like home."
So true!

Bernie, I am hoping to read soon that a south London stray kitty cat has found you.

As much as I would like that, not sure if a kitty is right at this time. For myself driving right in is ok, since I have decedents. Bernie does not.
Spitie(?) was lucky to have Bernie.

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Pluto will always be a Planet to me.

It's strange how different people react to Bernie's news that he wants to stay in London rather than IoW. For me it's important that he is "happy and content" in where he lives, and it is obvious to me that he likes his place in London, it obviously has some good memories for him, while the IoW doesn't. So he stays where he is happiest, and it's not for us to nay-say his choice.

Enjoy London Bernie - "Live long and prosper".

---

Bob Smith
Member of Seti PIPPS (Pluto is a Planet Protest Society)
Somewhere in the (un)known Universe?

To be fair I never actually liked my fathers bungalow, not to my taste at all. The events of the last few months have made me want to get out of it asap.

The IOW as they say is "a nice place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there". I am sure I will visit, possibly next year.

No, Croydon is home, it is where I want to be, where my heart is, as they say.

As to a cat, I am afraid losing Spitty was such an emotional time, I could not go through that again. I never want to have to make that sort of decision again, ever.

Then followed by having to care for my father and the mixture of emotions surrounding his decline and eventual death are just to raw at the moment.

It is now time to care for myself for a bit, and decide what I want. I believe that can only really start when I leave the island.

It is now time to care for myself for a bit, and decide what I want.

I wish you the best, Bernie.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

+1 for Bernie and all others going thru a difficult time. His pictures always make my day, when he cares to share them.

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Pluto will always be a Planet to me.

So yesterday I packed the last boxes into my car, read the gas and electric meters, locked up and left.

I am now at home for the foreseeable future. I have no idea what I want to do yet, but a bit of R&R seems high on the list.

I took a couple of "last sunset" shots from the pier on Thursday evening and will post them in the pictures thread.

What I will post here are a couple of shots that really say it all.

These were taken by the IP cameras I installed;

This was taken before my father passed away and is of the living room where he spent most of his days.



His chair was the one with the blue cushion.

This was last Tuesday after the British Heart Foundation had cleared the room.

A friend of mine has an elderly mother living 2 miles away from her, she wants to keep an eye on. I take it the sort of IP cameras you had would not be accessible remotely from the house, only within it.

You need broadband and Wi-Fi at the camera end. The cameras connect to the broadband hub/router via Wi-Fi, you download an app on a smartphone or use the internet from a computer to connect to the cameras.

I was able to watch the cameras in my dads bungalow from home or on my iPhone and iPad when out and had access to Wi-Fi in say a Starbucks.

So it has been five weeks now since I left the Isle of Wight.

Slowly but surely I am starting to find my way again, even managing to clear out a cupboard so it least I only have 15 boxes rather than the 20 I brought back.

Going for long walks, taking pictures and giving my computers much needed maintenance and housekeeping is keeping me busy (I am currently trying to get files from a dying HDD), but still the memories and images are there when I stop. I still cannot rid myself of the feeling I could have done more.

The mortgage company put my fathers house on the market 3 weeks ago and have had lots of interest, which saw 6 offers by the deadline last Friday, they were about to except the highest, which was for £280,500, £500 over the asking price when they received 3 more offers all higher!!

I knew that the area was sort after and I phoned the next door neighbour who said there had been lots of people viewing.

So it should sell this week or next. Due to my father taking out a "lifetime mortgage" he only owned 5%. So my sister and I will only get 2.5% each. Currently that seems to be about £7,000 each.

Enough I am hoping to be able to give my flat a bit of a face lift, but most importantly to visit the USA and all the people I know there for possibly the last time as I doubt I will be able to afford it again, I am hopeful to be able to undertake my "coast to coast" trip by Amtrak.

The sale of my fathers house has left me with mixed feelings, while it was not my birthplace or a "family home" it was my home for nearly a year and the last place my father and stepmother lived.

I am still toying with the idea of a short holiday here in the UK, to perhaps allow me to enjoy a freedom I have not had for a while.

As with all things time will tell. If there are any here caring for relatives, my thoughts go out to you, it is hard and sometimes a difficult thing to do.

It is however worth it and has it's own rewards.

Bernie, you did an amazing job taking care of your father.

When I chose to be my mother's caregiver, I didn't think about the end. I hoped it would be a long time away, but there's no way to prepare yourself for a parent to die.

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The mind is a weird and mysterious place

Bernie, you did an amazing job taking care of your father.

You did :)

When I chose to be my mother's caregiver, I didn't think about the end. I hoped it would be a long time away, but there's no way to prepare yourself for a parent to die.

No :( There isn't :(

You "know" that's the way round it's "supposed" to be, but when the roles get reversed and you find yourself being their "dad" or "mum" to whatever degree their frailty, the bond they established with you before you ever knew who they were, forms as strong I think.

Bernie, you did an amazing job taking care of your father.

You did :)

When I chose to be my mother's caregiver, I didn't think about the end. I hoped it would be a long time away, but there's no way to prepare yourself for a parent to die.

No :( There isn't :(

You "know" that's the way round it's "supposed" to be, but when the roles get reversed and you find yourself being their "dad" or "mum" to whatever degree their frailty, the bond they established with you before you ever knew who they were, forms as strong I think.

Your right Annie, You cant prepare your self. Even when you know that day is not that long off. You hope it can be put off, But you don't have a say on how long that is.
I haven't posted it On the main board here. But My Mom passed away Oct 30th. It was sudden and totally unexpected.
And again Annie, you are so right on about the bond a mom has with her children. I was probably almost 4 when I knew I had parents and a younger sister.
And even after almost 4 weeks, I can still feel the bond with my mom.

Annie, For some reason, You have the knack of posting words that I need to read. You have the rare ability to take a feeling that cant be described and putting it into words.
Thank you my friend.

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[/quote]

Old James

I haven't posted it On the main board here. But My Mom passed away Oct 30th. It was sudden and totally unexpected.

:((

Oh James, I'm so sorry :'( My heartfelt condolences to you and your family. You must all be devastated.

And again Annie, you are so right on about the bond a mom has with her children. I was probably almost 4 when I knew I had parents and a younger sister.
And even after almost 4 weeks, I can still feel the bond with my mom.

It's there forever. When the loss is sudden and just presented to us as a fait accompli, ooh my... that is going to hurt! :( We don't get and stay numb enough to absorb everything we've lost in the early days we grieve. Each realisation is a new grief to assimilate. That bond is what can hold us together, just, while we hurt.

Annie, For some reason, You have the knack of posting words that I need to read. You have the rare ability to take a feeling that cant be described and putting it into words.
Thank you my friend.

Words are such rubbish tools so much of the time. I'm glad you found something you could draw from in mine :) It doesn't mean you get to escape one of my giant internet hugs though. It's got your name on it and will probably get to you around about the time I click "post reply" ;)

@Chris

I think Annie is quite right, how can anyone prepare for the death of a parent,

My sister ran a plan past me when we were about six-and-a-half. We'd buy a caravan and bury our mom underneath it so she was always with us :)

So my brother and I have never had what Annie has had to shoulder.

My shoulders were "taken away" two weeks ago yesterday :((

I'm struggling with that.

Had a call during the middle of the night. My Dad's sister who is taking care of their mother called and said that she had passed away in her sleep.
I know it been a while since I posted about my Grandmother. I think the last update was she had a spine surgery.
Well she went to a nursing home for a couple of months. She was receiving hospice care there. She finally decided she would get better. So she worked and improved her health enough for a decision was granted to let her go home. On October 20th she returned to her home. She had to have help to get around the house, but she was where she finally wanted to be.
The funeral will be soon. The date is not set yet. My Grandmother has already made and paid for all the major arrangements years back. She felt she didn't want to be a burden on her children when she "sloughed off her mortal coil." All that is needed is to contact whoever wants to be at the funeral and let the funeral parlor do their thing.

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Sorry to hear the news, also Admiral. :-(

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Admiral, I hope that you have many warm memories of your grandmother that will sustain you as you mourn her loss.

Wishing you peace and comfort.