I saw this on another forum and wanted to start this new thread to seek out the quipsters, the profound and the downright silly of this forum. No salacious comments and keep it clean please.

The below post put me on the floor laughing my bum off.

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On the subject of children my mother always said,
"Throw the first two away."


(1927 Valdosta, GA)

Frances Nathan
1912-2010

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"Behind every great man is a great woman. And behind her is his wife."
--- Groucho Marx

Always a favorite. :^)

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He he he he! :)

Not sure this counts but its one of my favourites.

"So tell me! When God made women... was it a mistake? OR DID HE DO IT TO US ON PURPOSE!?"

(Jack Nicholson's character in The witches of Eastwick)

My dad had a saying about a dull knife blade. He'd say why that knife is so dull you could ride to Buffalo on it.

It was 150 miles from Syracuse to Buffalo So I sure hope the blade was dull:)

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[/quote]

Old James

Of course women don’t work as hard as men…
They get it right the first time.

Hehehe:))

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rOZZ
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Why do we sing Hymns and not Hers then?

Yes!

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Why do we sing Hymns and not Hers then?

To expand on that:

In every church wedding, the bride always has three things found there on her mind: Aisle, Altar, Hymn. :^)

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he he he he - SNORT! Don't mind me - just dispensing a few rice crispies out my nose.

Of course women don’t work as hard as men…
They get it right the first time.
Work?

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The smartest thing a man can say: 'My wife says...'

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rOZZ
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:) Hope this doesn't spoil the current party...

I thought I'd turned into my driveway till I crashed into a tree I haven't got.


More laughs to be found here :)

http://www.businessballs.com/insuranceclaims.htm

Hope everyone's having a lovely day!

or even better is when they say......

'Darling, it would be much better if you did it this way.....'

Dammit, 9/10 they're right and they only let us win the 10th time to make us feel good :-(

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Oh my! I think I have a déjà entendue:)))

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rOZZ
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The first 5 days after the weekend are always the hardest.

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A person who makes no mistakes, creates nothing.

The first 5 days after the weekend are always the hardest.

He he he

I don't know, the first few hours are okay - till you wake up.

When I become minister for sport... there'll be 22 men chasing 1 ball with no air in it. (Campaign donations welcome :))

Dammit, 9/10 they're right and they only let us win the 10th time to make us feel good :-(

Rubbish!

"Sweetheart, I know that you think you understand what you thought I said, but I'm not sure you fully realise that what you heard is not what I actually meant".

By the time they've figured it out, they've forgotten what the problem was. Gets 'em every time.

A woman forgetting that a man upset them? Stop dreaming!

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Dammit, 9/10 they're right and they only let us win the 10th time to make us feel good :-(

Rubbish!

He he he he he... my other half used to say "rubbish" a lot in response to what I had to say... till my son started googling it... now he just agrees with me :)

Dammit, 9/10 they're right and they only let us win the 10th time to make us feel good :-(

Rubbish!

"Sweetheart, I know that you think you understand what you thought I said, but I'm not sure you fully realise that what you heard is not what I actually meant".

By the time they've figured it out, they've forgotten what the problem was. Gets 'em every time.

Hm, wish it were that easy sometimes...

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rOZZ
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