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Profile James SotherdenProject Donor
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Message 981423 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 2:05:02 UTC

Good evening, Its friday night for the criminally bad punsters.

Here is one that I heard on an old radio program called Fibber Magee and Molly.
A wife askes her Husband to walk to the store in a raging rainstorm to buy a goose for supper. The man replys that its not fit to go outside for, Man nor Geese.


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Old James

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msattler - meow!!
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Message 981437 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 2:49:27 UTC

So I says to my friend........
Take my wife........please.........
Henny Youngman....wayyyyyyyyyyyyy before most of you time.

Am I too late for the garbage??
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Meow, and the world meows with you. Bark, and you bark alone.

Have made a few friends in life.
Most were cats.

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Profile AngelaProject Donor
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Message 981508 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 6:27:37 UTC

Sorry I missed the festivities tonight. We spent a pleasant, but busy, day with house guests.

Mark, I'm sure that if you asked Lori what she thought of marriage she would say it has a nice RING to it.

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Message 981514 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 6:37:00 UTC

Angela, How RICE that you are here.
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Message 981515 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 6:41:32 UTC

Yeah, yeah... strike up the BAND.

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Profile James SotherdenProject Donor
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Message 981517 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 6:45:17 UTC

Id say any girl who gets married, deserves the MAID of HONOUR.
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Message 981520 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 6:47:23 UTC

I am just too tired tonight to get into a long pun ALTARcation...

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Message 981525 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 6:51:48 UTC

So your going to THROW the bouquet in early.
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Message 981527 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 6:54:09 UTC

Yes, I'm TOAST and I know from past experience that a long pun war can be a CHAMPAGNE in the... (don't think I can say that here.)

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Message 981529 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:00:20 UTC

I hear that. So how dowry are you? qwerty yourself maybe?
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Message 981531 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:03:24 UTC

Jim, your puns are like a wedding cake. They bring me to TIERS...

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Profile James SotherdenProject Donor
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Message 981532 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:05:27 UTC

Ive seen some weddings wear the bride and groom eat there cake and wear it too.
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Message 981533 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:07:17 UTC

Thank goodness Eric and I were not cake smashers! If he had tried that on me, he would not have gotten a good RECEPTION.

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Message 981535 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:13:16 UTC - in response to Message 981533.
Last modified: 20 Mar 2010, 7:13:56 UTC

Thank goodness Eric and I were not cake smashers! If he had tried that on me, he would not have gotten a good RECEPTION.



LOL the only ring he would have heard is that frying pan bouncing off his head. He'd be seeing a MOON from his HONEY.
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Message 981536 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:16:59 UTC

Yes, such behavior would have given me a LICENSE to kill, and I wouldn't even care if there were WITNESSES!

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Message 981537 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:18:46 UTC

would you have TIED the KNOT around his neck?
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Message 981539 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:28:04 UTC

Perhaps... at the very least I'd have given him his WEDDING MARCHing orders!

Well Jim, tonight's pun war really takes the CAKE, but since we have GUESTS right now, I really can't stay here at this WEDDING PARTY any longer. You will just have to BRIDE your time until I can return. About the only thing I will have time to do this weekend is MINISTER to our guests, and maybe GROOM our cats, but I promise to return next weekend.

So without further CEREMONY, I say to you "goodnight punsters!!!"

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Message 981540 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 7:31:32 UTC

Good night Angela. It was fun walking down the aisle with you tonight:)

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Message 981603 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 11:16:08 UTC

A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired.

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LETS BEGIN IN 2010

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Message 981685 - Posted: 20 Mar 2010, 16:35:01 UTC

Theres something about a wedding on a well manicured lawn that gets me all GRASSY-eyed.
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