> DR. PHIL:
> The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he
> must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it
> goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need
> to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on
> his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.
>
> OPRAH:
> Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why
> he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken
> learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm
> going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the
> road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
>
> GEORGE W. BUSH:
> We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want
> to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The
> chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground
> here.
>
> COLIN POWELL:
> Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite
> image of the chicken crossing the road...
>
> ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
> We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet
> been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.
>
> JOHN KERRY:
> Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against
> it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the
> chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
>
> NANCY GRACE:
> That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in
> his eyes and the way he walks.
>
> PAT BUCH ANAN:
> To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
>
> MARTHA STEWART:
> No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a
> standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price
> dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider
> information.
>
> DR SEUSS:
> Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the
> chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
>
> ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
> To die in the rain. Alone.
>
> JERRY FALWELL:
> Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth?'
> That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that
> chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too.
> I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that
> the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phr ases
> like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road.
> It's as plain and as simple as that.
>
> GRANDPA:
> In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody
> told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
>
> BARBARA WALTERS:
> Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the
> chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it
> experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its
> life long dream of crossing the road.
>
> ARISTOTLE:
> It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
>
> JOHN LENNON:
> Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in
> peace.
>
> BILL GATES:
> I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads,
> but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
> check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This
> new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^
> (C% ......... reboot.
>
> ALBERT EINSTEIN:
> Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath
> the chicken?
>
> BILL CLINTON:
> I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition
> of chicken?
>
> AL GORE:
> I invented the chicken!
>
> COLONEL SANDERS:
> Did I miss one?
>
> DICK CHENEY :
> Where's my gun?
>
> AL SHARPTON:
> Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

George Orwell:
Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.

Fox Mulder:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

Captain Kirk:
Why did the chicken cross the road? To boldly go where no chicken has gone before!

Darwin:
It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.

Moses:
And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

The Pope:
That is only for God to know.

;)

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It may not be 1984 but George Orwell sure did see the future . . .

@ Ozz.....nice. Funny stuff....love it.

@ Jeff...nice additions....lmao

---

Air Cold, the blade stops;
from silent stone,
Death is preordained

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